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Redefining Love: A New Insight that Can Transform All Areas of Your Life

Activate Your Self Confidence - Elena Perella, Sentidu Life Coach

Depriving yourself of love is equal to depriving yourself of living, with consequences in all areas of your life. Love is the energy that fosters growth and elevates us to new levels. And without it there is no progress, no living, but only surviving.

Loving yourself is the key to everything

In order to achieve your maximum potential and become the person you know you can be, learning to really love yourself is a must. Whether you are a parent, a businessman, or a housewife, if you  really love yourself, only then you will be able to live a truly satisfactory life. “Satisfactory life,” meaning an inner peace not necessarily related to any achievements, possessions, relationships, or career success; but rather related to a balanced inner feeling that “I am enough. When you don’t live in this “balanced inner feeling,” you will simply live in survival mode, settling for way less than your capabilities; or worse, you will go through live feeling miserable, no matter what you achieve.
In order to really learn to love yourself we have to put aside what you have learned about self-love and love in general, and embrace a new concept:

“Love is the will to extend one’s self for the purpose of nurturing one’s own or another’s spiritual growth… Love is as love does. Love is an act of will — namely, both an intention and an action. Will also implies choice. We do not have to love. We choose to love.” (M. Scott Peck)

Building upon Scott Peck’s definition, I will say that real love is:

The energy that you use to help yourself for the purpose of nurturing your own personal and professional growth. You can choose to activate (self) love, but can fully do it only after you identify and eliminate your family’s toxic conditionings."

Choose to love yourself! That choice in itself will get you started on your journey toward complete self-love.

Learning to really love yourself will help you:

  • Identify and defeat toxic emotions
  • Have a solid sense of self, knowing that you are enough
  • Improve the quality of your life
  • Don’t get lost in a spiral of uncertainties and worries
  • Use healthy negative emotions to make the right choices and decisions
  • Find a sense of purpose

And much more…

Once you learn to really love yourself, even when you fail at something — because we can’t always succeed in everything — you won’t beat yourself up feeling unworthy and you will know that you are adequate of being more and doing more than those around you made you believe.

How do you detoxify from your family’s toxic emotional inheritance?

Most people think they love themselves but they really don’t. This can sound harsh but it is the truth. The lives of the majority of people is a mess, even when appearances might tell us a different story; if we don’t do anything about it, we will continue to feel miserable and keep hopelessly chasing happiness. By denying the truth about our lack of self-love, we are passing onto our children a toxic legacy that will force them to repeat stories and experiences that don’t belong to them, but are the repetion of our family’s toxic inheritance.

Is this what we really want for them?

If your answer is NO, then acknowledging that you might carry inside yourself your family’s toxic legacy is the first step. By doing this you will open the door to start identifying all toxic inherited elements in your heart, mind, and body that are not yours, and that are holding you back.

Here are some signs that might be an indication of a lack of self-love:

  • You know what is good for you but you don’t do it
  • You complain often about all kind of trivial matters
  • You are not happily married or in a relationship that meets your needs
  • You chose your partner or spouse because he or she is “safe”
  • You had children because you wanted to prove to your parents that you could do it better than they did
  • You want a partner because you feel the need to be with someone
  • You don’t like yourself much
  • You are in your current job for survival purposes only
  • You often feel sad or even depressed
  • You don’t read, study, don’t stretch your mind; in one word, you don’t grow intellectually
  • You believe everything that comes from outside sources without questioning them
  • You often find yourself at the side of the majority
  • You don’t exercise because you feel unmotivated or lazy
  • You are repeating mistakes that your parents or other family members made
  • You overeat or have unhealthy eating habits
  • You abuse substances (weed or other illegal substancies)
  • You smoke

And much more…

Love is like air – without it we die. While we all long to be loved by someone special and love someone special, it all starts with loving ourselves. Without self-love we can’t create successfull romantic love.  M. Scott Peck said Ultimately love is everything; and while to some that seems extreme, if you don’t let love in your business, personal life, or literally in any area of your life, you will grow old dissatisfied, feeling lost, and miserable, no matter what you have achieved materially.

Just like letting light into a dark room by opening a window, you can let love in all areas of your life, if you are ready.
This is the right time to take action and activate love inside of you, to distinguish yourself, create a new mentality, and a new way of living a complete and fruitful life. You, at the center of your reality, will live your life elevated to a higher internal level, from where you will co-exist in harmonious synergy with your environment and the world, free from your family’s and societal toxic conditionings. And through this new way of experiencing reality you will effortlessly be able to guide your children do the same.

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About the author

Elena Perella is NOT a therapist, a psychologist or a psychiatrist; she is a coach who focuses on helping clients indentify the real reasons behind their suffering and problems. Born and raised on the beautiful Mediterranean island of Sardinia, Elena is passionate about what she does, and with good reason. Elena coached herself through a severe depression, eating disorders and domestic violence and her experience has led her on a journey of discovery of how to break out all of these challenges. As a result she created Sentidu Life Coaching to help people experience their own transformation and break free in the areas they feel stuck

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